Cowlingswyn is a town of many parades. And first Fridays. And second Saturdays. And tree lightings and car shows and art shows and Mayfairs. These events generally occur on the main street where most of the restaurants are located. This can be both a blessing and a curse.
Sure, the multitudes passing by result in greater visibility of "The Joint," but closing off the street on these days and evenings often keeps guests who INTENDED on dining there from ever making it. I know that if I went to make a left on Braddon Ave. and the street was closed I'd make a right instead and head for B.J.s for dinner, because my next question would be: " Where the hell am I going to park if theres a goddamn parade?"
The greater problem though, usually lies with those who HADN'T intended on dining with us, but do happen to wander in. Yes "The Joint" has windows that look out to the street- that doesn't make it the fucking judge's grandstand, where you, your wife, another couple and your collective twelve brats can set up shop, order forty bucks worth of apps, and drink the six bottles of "Jersey Sweet Red" you brought for three hours in the warmth of my section while said brats run in and out of the restaurant everytime they see a float they like and let the cold air in you are trying to get away from by watching a parade from a fucking restaurant in the first place. Was that a run-on sentence?
Want to take advantage of a restaurtant being nearby to a public event you are attending? Awesome. Come in beforehand for a quick dinner, feed the kids and grab a coffee with the check to warm up before you enjoy the evening's OUTDOOR festivities. Or time it so that you'll be dining as the parade goes by if you really want to; I don't mind if you request a window table if you show up on time, order and eat with some semblence of pace, and have dessert as the crowds dissipate. I don't even care if you wander in for coffee and dessert after the event, so long as it's late enough where others who are actually there to eat aren't waiting for a table.
In warmer weather: Don't sit at one of my patio tables and do nothing so you can relax and enjoy the jazz trio that's playing out front. Stand the fuck in front of them like everyone else that's watching. Live music is a nice accompaniment to dinner, I must admit. But then ORDER dinner for Pete's sake; my outdoor dining area isn't your own personal mezzanine at the Kimmel Center. People have to pay thousands of dollars and subscribe for such a priveledge, so if you do what me and my friends did Sunday night- stay at a table at a restaurant for three hours so we could enjoy my favorite live Christmas performance in it's entirety- do what my friend did and leave a hundred-dollar tip. Tickets for such an amazing live show would've cost much more and the poor server, who to that point thought we had wasted her whole night, had her little day made : )
What I'm saying is that a nearby event or performance doesn't mean you can do whatever you want and punish the restautrant just for its proximity. Granted, "The Joint" is by now well prapared to handle the uncertainty surrounding the seating on such days. But help us out willya? If your party of twelve is at six o' clock, why shouldn't I expect the table back by eight or eight-thirty if the food and service are efficient?
Or if you do plan to take up half a room for an entire Saturday night then you better order three fucking courses or something because from now on, if you don't want anymore coffee, I'm gonna pick-pocket you, use the shiniest card you have to pay the check, leave 20% (which is always accepted) on your behalf, and start pulling tables away. This will be after I hip-check your Carl Lewis-esque banshee of a child through the very same window through which you are viewing the parade...
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